Dec 16, 2024

NEWMAN: The meaning behind memories — why traditions matter

Posted Dec 16, 2024 2:59 PM
Newman shares that family traditions create lasting emotional bonds through shared memories, meaningful objects, and time spent together, fostering connection and identity across generations. <b>Image Courtesy KSRE</b>
Newman shares that family traditions create lasting emotional bonds through shared memories, meaningful objects, and time spent together, fostering connection and identity across generations. Image Courtesy KSRE

By LISA NEWMAN
K-State Research and Extension
Central Kansas District
Family and Community Wellness Extension Agent

I have a very tattered and worn Christmas stocking that is nearly 50 years old. To look at it, it's nothing fancy: it is red and made of thin felt. You can't even hang it up anymore because the loop used to hang it broke many years ago. But this stocking is mine and it is very special to me. What makes it special is the joy I see on my mom’s face when she presents it to me each year, and the childlike wonder it brings as we share time together.

These emotions have nothing to do with the content of the stocking. Just as my stocking holds memories and love, family traditions can create similar lasting connections. Simple traditions and objects like my Christmas stocking can hold profound meaning, rooted in emotional connection, nostalgia, and shared family rituals. These moments and items are powerful tools in strengthening family bonds, building identity and fostering joy that transcends material aspects. Curious about building or strengthening family traditions in your home? Here are three ways to get you started.

1. Create Traditions with Special Objects

My Christmas stocking is a perfect example of how a simple object can become a cherished part of a family’s story. These items are more than just “things” - they carry the love, joy, and memories associated with family traditions. Research shows that sentimental items linked to rituals strengthen family identity and create lasting emotional connections.

If you’d like to create a tradition around a special object, start by designating what that special object could be – a handmade ornament, a plush elf that only visits the house during December, etc.

2. Make Time for Togetherness

The real magic of Christmas for me isn’t about the stocking itself but the time spent with my mom and my family. Studies show that shared activities – like family meals or holiday rituals like opening our stockings – boost communication and emotional closeness. I encourage you to choose a simple activity that everyone in your family enjoys. Maybe it’s baking cookies, or maybe it’s watching holiday movies. The activity itself matters less than the togetherness it fosters.

3. Start New Traditions and Keep Them Flexible

Traditions don’t have to be old to be meaningful. They can evolve over time, just like my stocking has evolved into a cherished ritual in our family. Starting new traditions ensures they remain relevant and meaningful for the family as they grow and change. This year, reflect on your family’s unique interests and values to create a new tradition. For example, maybe you could all write notes of gratitude to place in stockings or a family journal.

You could also consider twisting old traditions. For example, you could turn gift-giving into a scavenger hunt or incorporate a charitable activity into your traditions, such as donating toys to a local non-profit.

Family traditions, like my cherished Christmas stocking, remind us that the simplest things often carry the deepest meaning. They are not defined by their material value but by the love, joy, and connection they represent. These traditions become the legacy of togetherness we pass on – a gift more enduring than any object, shaping the heart of our families for generations to come.